Category: Maria Bella

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THREE YEARS!

Well, we’re back from our road trip to the Asheville Burlesque and Sideshow Festival with Maria Bella and Little Luna of Gilded Lily Burlesque and Mourna Handful – which was absolutely amazing by the way and why we’ve been relatively quiet for a week – and it’s time to catch up on all things Dr. Sketchy’s Baltimore.

First off, here’s a blog post by Sagittarius Dolly about her second trip to Dr. Sketchy’s Baltimore (last session with Roma Mafia).  Here’s a link to her first trip – I meant to link to her blog a week ago but got caught up with traveling nonsense.  They’re pretty neat, and if you want an impression of a Dr. Sketchy’s Baltimore session not written by us, you should check ’em out.

Well, that’s it….nothing else really going on…..

OH WAIT.  Monday is our

THREE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!

Holy #$%^!

Photo by Anna Charlie

Folks…FOLKS, *this* is the big one.  We’re finally leaving the Terrible Two’s and dive head first into the Tantrum Three’s.  This is where we finally stop saying “no” and start saying “ye….” – hmm, actually, after flipping through Dr. Spock, this is apparently where we start biting. 

We’ve got prizes galore from Atomic Books, Artist & Craftsman, Baby Tattoo . . . AND Flying Dog beer, our brand new sponsor!  Oh hell yeah!  Here’s the Facebook event by the way – if you’re coming, let us know, it lets us know how many shots to do before we open the doors at six.

Marla “So Cute It Hurts” Meringue of Sticky Buns Burlesque, who you can see above, will be modeling for this no-holds-barred, shenanigan-infused, bring-bail-money, pinch-yourself-cause-you-got-to-be-dreaming Dr. Sketchy’s – and, well, holy bejesus, if you don’t want to draw Marla in all her glory then you need to stick corks in your ears ’cause your brain is messing up that shirt your momma bought you.

I’m telling ya, you’re not going to be able to swing a cat without smacking a good time in the face on Monday (not to mention knocking over a bunch of pencil jars, beers, and seriously irritating the cat).

Can’t wait?  Well, here’s two things that might help in the interim – Sticky Buns Burlesque is performing tonight, Wednesday, at Cazbar at 8:30, not only that, they’re performing Saturday, as is Gilded Lily Burlesque, and, well, just about everybody else at Sex. Art. Rock N Roll at Area 405 at 6 pm.  You can see Marla at both, along with tons of other folks who’ve modeled for Dr. Sketchy’s Baltimore over the last 3 years.

THREE YEARS.

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Gilded Lily Burlesque’s Halloween Show this Sunday!

Hey folks, don’t forget Gilded Lily Burlesque’s Halloween Show is this Sunday at the Ottobar.  That’s pretty much 80% of our models all in one spot in all their pastie glory!

Here’s the info from their Facebook page –

Gilded Lily Burlesque Halloween Show
Oct 10th
Show at 9pm, tickets $13
The Ottobar
2549 N. Howard Street
Baltimore, MD
www.theottobar.com

Come on out to enjoy a pre-Halloween vaudeville show with Gilded Lily Burlesque and special guests: Kay Sera from Bmore, femcee Kittie Glitter from D.C.; the candy-coated cutie, Lil Miss Lixx from N.Y.; the vaudeville antics of Mab Just Mab from D.C. and the amazing fire performance of Malibu from D.C. Some of the biggest names in burlesque and sideshow will be sure to bring the glitz, glam, humor and unique talent to entertain and engage you this Halloween.

Stay tuned during intermission and after the show to have your tarot cards read for only $10 by the amazing Venus Out of Bounds! You will also have the opportunity to purchase merchandise from Lil Miss Lixx and Gilded Lily Burlesque, as well as vintage clothing sold by pinup model, Lauren Marleaux!!

– And for God’s sake, don’t forget Dr. Sketchy’s is Monday with Paco Fish!

(photo of Paco Fish courtesy of Twilight Images by Melody Smith, www.twilightimages.net)

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La Bellissima Maria Bella

We have a new winner for my favorite photo ever taken at a Dr. Sketchy’s Baltimore.  Russell should just go ahead and give Maria Bella his scooter, ’cause honestly, it looks hotter with her on it.

This was our official Two Year Anniversary session!  If you missed it, well, you should just sit down right now and cry like an itty-bity-witty baby because Maria Bella, “Baltimore’s Sicilian Princess” and founder of Gilded Lily Burlesque, was absolutely gorgeous—if she had been a snake, not only would you have NOT missed her in the grass, she would have had her own late-night SciFi Channel movie where she gobbled up an entire village in the Congo or something.

And there were cupcakes from Sweet Sin Bakery!

Before we got the ball rolling, we had a mini-contest at 6:50 for a rail drink.  The question was, “Can you name another member of Gilded Lily besides Maria?”  Some lucky fellow in the back shouted out Sable Syn Cyr, which, while not currently correct, got “old school” points since she was a member until she moved to Wisconsin a little while ago.  Plus, her picture was on the wall, so who are we to be sticklers?

With that, Maria Bella took the stage and the 1 & 2 minute poses began.

Our first contest contest of the evening—well, I guess it was the second—was the good ol’ “If you’re right-handed with your left, if you’re left-handed draw with your right, and if your ambidextrous, your calling is Kung-Fu, not drawing burlesque performers”.

A few more five-minute poses…

Next up were the ten-minute poses.  The first pose was our third contest which was the best incorporation of an accordion with the winner receiving a $15 gift card from Atomic Books in Hampden, on Falls Rd. just off the Avenue.

R. L. May III

lanikei

The second ten-minute pose was the one we dragged Russell’s moped up onto the stage for.  You’d think that wouldn’t be too difficult, but that stupid thing must weigh a ton.  It got up there after a fair amount of cussing though.

Liz Beetem

Next up were the twenty minute poses and another contest which was the best incorporation of a drop bear with the winner getting Visions From Within the Mechanism: The Industrial Surrealism of Jeffery Scott from Baby Tattoo Books.

The weekend before Dr. Sketchy’s, Alexis, Maria, and I took a trip to Asheville, NC for the Asheville Burlesque and Sideshow Festival.  Maria was performing and since my folks live in Asheville, carpooling seemed the cheapest and funnest way to mosey down there.  Not only that, but the ten-hour car ride gave me plenty of time to run on at the mouth at excruciating length about the local fauna, so Maria would be prepared if a wild boar tried to chew off her leg or a snake popped out of her salad.  (She actually saw 4 snakes over two days, though it was probably 2 snakes seen twice—wait, one of the performers was carrying around a snake, so does that make 5?  I suppose it’s not important.)  Anyways, this may sound like Jager-induced paranoia, but forewarning tourists is what stops people’s babies from being carried off by bald eagles and shit.

What we were talking about?  Oh, drop bears.  One of the many carnivorous hazards of my fair home state is the wily  Drop Bearfirocicus.  A sub-species of the normal mountain black bear, drop bears are basically black bears that are soooo fat and lazy they eventually get tired of killing mooses (meeses?), elk, and raiding old ladys’ trash cans.  Instead, the climb up in a tree and wait, sometimes for days at a time, until some tourist, park ranger, or teenagers looking to have sex in the woods walk by and then BLAM, they fall right out of the tree and squish them flat with their big ol’ butt.

I’m telling you, it’s a god-damn zoo down there.

Knowledge is half the battle, folks.

So, best incorporation of drop bears . . .

Ben Carnow (winner)

Liz Beetem

Mike Hasson

Last up for the evening was a final 20-minute pose and a contest for the best incorporation of the World’s Cup with the prize being a slick frame from Artist & Craftsman Supply which is just across the street on the corner of North and Howard.  (They’re open till 8 too, so if you forget your art supplies, for God’s sake run over there and tell them you came from us.)

Liz Beetem

Ben Carnow

Mike Hasson

We’d like to thank Baltimore’s Sicilian Princess, Maria Bella of Gilded Lily Burlesque, for making our second anniversary session a rousing success, and not only that, but driving us down to Asheville with her and for just an over all kick-ass weekend.  We’d also like to thank our generous sponsors Atomic Books, Artist & Craftsman Supply, and Baby Tattoo Books for donating prizes for us give away.  Thanks as well to Russell of the Windup Space for slinging drinks, CDs, and his moped up onto the stage; Jeff for the stunning photos you see above; and to Alexis for being our sardonic host.


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